Saturday, April 14, 2007


The other day I was in a store when I came across the "old" metal type of lunch box like I used to take to school. Only this one was new and it had no thermos. I'm sorry but that is sacred...lunch boxes and a new thermos are suppose to go together.They are a pair and they belong together. Some things are like that...they are just meant to be a set.

Sometimes I look at my son and wonder how he will feel about his adoption as he ages because we don't look like a matching set. I'm like the Barbie Lunch Box. My strength keeps him protected and safe from falls. I act as his cocoon by holding him and carrying him. And the fact that we are not a matching set never seems to bother him until that day someone in school points out that I am a Barbie Lunch Box and he is a Superman Thermos. And in that second it may occur to him that many people think that Barbie and Superman don't go together. That they were never meant to be. And that, in fact, he belongs in the Superman Lunch Box because they look the same and therefore they should be together based on their shared attributes. And I hope when the time comes I remember to tell him that matching sets are not always what is important. That sometimes what really matters is the fact that they needed to be together whether they look the same or not. The lunch box needs the thermos so that a thirst is quenched while the thermos needs the lunch box to help feed a soul. That together they work as a team. That they are a set and while they may not match they still are able to get the job done...together...matching or not.

And this is why you don't write when you have had no sleep!!!!

Saturday, April 7, 2007

There Are Some Days And Then There Are SOME Days

One day this week I decided to make my husband happy and take my van through the car wash. Let me explain that my husband always has an impecable car whereas mine, well lets just say I consider cleaning my car when and only when the kids can write their names in the dust on the INSIDE of the car.

So just as the water starts I realize that the sunroof is a little bit open. So I push the button to close it and I end up pushing it the wrong way so that the sunroof opens all the say and I cannot shut it. Chemical cleaners start spraying throughout the car and all over me and the kids. Finally I get the sun roof shut and as I look at my seat I see that the cleaner has left spots all over it. Now I don't know if it is because of what was in the cleaner or the fact that my interior was so dirty that ANYTHING would have cleaned it.

Later in the day, Karson using his usual forrest of toilet paper plugs up the toilet and water is going everywhere and then Kullen comes up and pinches me on the butt as I am using the mixer and chocolate cake batter goes flying throughout the kitchen. But seriously that is nothing in the scheme of bad days. Here is the worst I can remember.

One morning I wake up to find raw sewage coming up the bathtub. Lovely. I call the plumber who cannot make it out until the afternoon. So at this point I decide that a walk on the beach is in order. So I load the dog into the car and off we go. We get to the beach, I get the dog out, and slam the door thereby locking my keys in the car. Finally after 1/2 hour on this deserted beach a man comes driving up in his little two seater convertible and I convince him to give me a ride home...with the 90 pound dog sitting on my lap the entire way home. When I get home I remember that Dave asked me to take a very important letter to the post office and it has to go out TODAY. Since the mail is taken at noon I decide I better get down their quick. After a 2 mile walk in the broiling sun I arrive at the post office (which by the way is one of three public buildings in town) and realize that I left the letter at home. So I run home, literally, almost dying in the process and then go back to the post office only to see the truck leaving as I round the bend. At that point I head home, YET AGAIN, and find the plumber driving up the road I reach my driveway. Yep that is me always a day late and a dollar short. Unfortunatly it didn't just cost a dollar to fix the problem. In fact the plumber is down in the basement/laundry room. He says that "everything is fine" and he will be back in a moment.So I decide to flush the toilet that is filled with the raw sewage. About ten minutes later I decide I cannot postpone the inevitable because I have to go to the bathroom in the worst way. And it isn't pee. So I go and flush the toilet only to have the plumber scream. Seems he came back unbeknownst to me and had a piece of pipe off above the toilet and was looking up when my "little gift" came down the pipe line. I can honestly say it was one of the most embarrasing moments of my life.And not only that when I flushed the first time all the raw sewage flooded the basement. Lovely. I got to clean that up too. Then when my husband came home we want out to the beach to get my car and one the way out his car has a flat tire. The jack my car because I neglected to put it back. So we hike down to my car where we realize that I thought he had brought the keys and he thought I had. After another 20 mintues waiting for a rescue the SAME guy in the little red sports car shows up and we get driven home...except this time it is my on Dave's lap. We get the key and have a neighbor drive us back where this time everything works out the way you think it should. That would have been the end of this story if I hadn't told Dave that I was going to run out to the pizza shop and bring one home because I was just too tired to deal with dinner. And as I back down the driveway I run into his car which then rolls down the driveway. Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed.

Oh and then there is my cousin Kathy. A professional moving company was moving their belongings into their new house on top of a hill when all of a suddent the moving van starts rolling down hill and crashes into a neighbors house. Literally the van crashes INTO the house. So now all of a Kathy's worldly goods are sitting in a strangers house where they must remain for several days until the insurance adjustors can sort everything out.

So when you think you have had a bad day...think again.

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Beginnings and Ends

Today I took down the crib. It's a done deal. No more kids for it to hold. No more kids for it to protect. It all seems to a story coming to the end.
We put that crib up the first time over 16 years ago. It served four of our five children well. It is a light wood one with 14 slats on the sides, a stain of spit up in the left hand corner and on the end a dab of pale yellow paint that ended up there while I was painting Kellis' room. It's a crib that has been used as a trampoline as the kids got older and occasionally a "time out" space when someone needed to get their act together. More often than not it was me who needed it but I knew I would never fit.
Kylee was the first to use the crib but more often than not she ended up sleeping with us and after she was put on the apnea monitor the crib rarely saw any action.
Karson was the next one to use it and we were determined he would. Everyone chided us "you aren't going to do THAT again, are you? I mean sleeping with your child well it just isn't healthy." Of course, we never understood that an internationally adopted child who comes to you at over 6 months of age might just need to be with you even in sleep. So we put him in that crib every evening even though he woke up 5-7 times during the night in an attempt to reassure himself that we would still be there for him. Eventually, exhaustion set in and he ended up in our room.
Kullen was the third child to use the crib. He came home from Korea at 10.5 months and by the time he was 12 months old he was using it to practice vaulting and high jumping. Because our fear of a life threatening injury was so great he ended up in our room too.
Kellis is the last to use the crib. She was also the first to actually use it until at 2 years old she realized all the other kids were sleeping in beds and she wanted one. I have kept the crib up for the past 6 months even though she has not used it. There was just a part of me that didn't want to admit that we are done. Our family is complete and we are getting old.It is hard sometimes to acknowledge that "this is it" even though we know it is. Because it means the end of the known. The end of what feels comfortable. The end of something new entering your life. Endings are just that...the end. Its like closing the covers of a book when you have reached the last page. But like a good book the crib's story stays with yus, gives us things to ponder and some good passages to look back upon. And like a good book there is often a sequel which in this case is our grandchild who is due in September. A maybe...just maybe...that crib will be used once more. Because when you think about it-beginnings and ends-they really are the same thing aren't they.