Leaving Tomorrow

Hard to believe it is almost time to go to Ethiopia. As usual, I am terrified to fly and have my usual GOODBYE TO THE WORLD SPEECH. Here goes...

Okay, if my plane goes down, promise me you will write to my kids and tell them
how much I loved them. And Dave too. He has been a wonderful husband with the
patience of a SAINT. I want on my tombstone "LEAVE THE LIGHT ON SO I CAN SEE
WHERE THE DARK IS" I will trust that you guys will make sure that it happens.

To Ross:
You were always my favorite because you were my first born. I made a lot of mistakes with you but am grateful you love me anyway. Obviously, you have turned out okay...just look what a wonderful dad you are to Kaelyn. She is lucky that you are her father and will be rewarded for that throughout her life. You have really made me proud and I am really impressed with the man you are becoming. My wish for you is that your patience with others increases...obviously mine never did but one can still hope that you didn't get the entire gene. I carry my love for you forever no matter where we are.I Love You.

To Kylee:
You were always my favorite because you were my first born daughter. You were exactly what we had dreamed of when we dreamed of you. I made a lot of mistakes with you and hope you are wise enough not to repeat the worst of them. I know that when you find your direction you will make the most of it because you know how to take what you are given and then multimply it. I admire your courage and was so proud of you when you tested your wings and went to Brazil. Don't settle. Be grateful and happy for what you have. My wish for you is that you love wisely and kindly even tho you didn't always see that in me. Take after your dad and find a man like your and you will live a wonderful life. Please share the GOOD stories of me with the little kids and let them know that they were loved. You will always bring a smile to my face when I think of you. I Love You.

To Karson:
You were always my favorite because you were my second son and I wanted so much to meet you in Korea. Believe it or not I knew I loved you the moment I saw you and it made me so sad to see the "deer in the headlights" look you had for the first months home. I wish that I could have taken your scared confusion away so that you could learn to trust us sooner. You have greatness in you. You are smart, you are kind and you are a good friend and son. Stay strong in your life. Autism isn't who you are it is just a part of you. I expect great things from you and know that you will succeed in life no matter what. I hope you know that I love you "All the way to Pluto" now and forever. You will always be in my heart. I Love You.

To Kullen:
You were always my favorite because you were my third son and challenged me from the day you came home. I have to admit I fell in head and heels in love with you the minute I saw your picture on a website. I thought "That boy is my boy and he belings in this family." I am so thankful that I got my hearts desire in you. I wish for you that you use that incredible brain of yours and learn to keep your hands by your sides...it will make your life easier. You will be great at whatever you choose to do...I suspect it will be some sort of engineering. You see so many things in the world and in people that most people don't. It is a gift so always acknowledge that gift and be thankful for it. You will always be with me. I Love You.

To Kellis:
What can I say except you were always my favorite because you are my baby girl. Bringing you home was like bringing a ray of sunshine into our lives. You have such a way of shining joy all around you. May you always keep your light shining on others to remind them of all that is perfect in this world. I expect that you are going to be an artsy woman...a dancer, poet, writer...all wonderful things to be. Maybe a brain surgeon but whatever you choose to be I know you will do it with gusto and your whole heart. May you be wise in regards to boys and choose a man who is wonderful like your dad....you will never go wrong if you remember that advice. You are always in my heart. I Love You.

To Dave:
You know when I try and write about you the words escape me! How can one even try to convey how lucky and blessed I feel that I have had these wonderful years with you. You have always been an inspiration to me, my best friend and the type of person I would love to be when I grow up. The peace that resides in the center of your soul is so comforting and welcomes others to rest with you. It is an amazing characteristic you have...one most people do not have but wish that they did. You have given me a life that so many only dream about. The material things, trips have been wonderful but what a mean is the kind of life that has a base of stability because one knows that she is loved deeply and completely desite my faults. Thank you for giving me the best of you all of these years (21 today!) I could not have asked for more in this life. You will always be with me. I Love You.


Finally, your mission should you choose to accept it is to find a wife for Dave (he would need one) She MUST know the Toll House Cookie Recipe by heart! Dave is an incredible man and any woman who fell in love with him would be blessed 1000 fold.

Two Tales of the Traveling Pants

So I have been asking what to wear in Ethiopia and several people have told me (I thought) to bring parachute pants. This evening I started the great search for said pants and was snickered at, not once, but twice at two different stores.When I told the young thing in the clothing department what I was after, she looked at me and rolled her eyes and said, and I quote: "parachute pants were popular in the 80's along with Mike Hammer (insert snicker) I think if you want some of those you will have to go to a retro store."

Second sales girl says to me, " EWWWWW. That would be the fashion mistake of the 20th century...you can't be serious...har, har, har (trumpting like an elephant)

So I am left to ponder whether it is impossible to buy parachute pants except in MO or if this is a "Let's See What A Dork Cheryl Is" kind of practical joke which sounds like something the Bimbo from MO would do to get back at me for some unknown reason!

The SAGA CONTINUES

The next day I find I am mistaken. It is cargo pants I am SUPPOSE to be after. But here is the catch... cargo pants on Fat chics are no laughing matter. I learned this today as I tried on clothes for the trip to Ethiopia at the store. The trouble with cargo pants is they carry/hold EVERYTHING but your own fat. I mean, come on folks, there are no zippers to zip all the fat in place! These things are not meant to be decent pieces of clothing. They are a form of torture for you and anyone who has to look at you while you are wearing them! The worse thing is that I am buying them to leave in Africa when I return home. But, of course, there is one little problem... I will be the only FAT person on the entire continent!The only consulation I have is that if a seamstress gets hold of these she will be able to make two or three pairs of pants out of them. Nothing like cargo pants to depress the hell out of you!

BTW, if God was a fashion designer he surely created cargo pants as a tribute to Mr. Blackwell. And no I won't put up a photo...that would just be cruel to humanity.